Scott and SadieOh, you sweet summer children with your Spotify playlists and your instant downloads—you have no idea what we went through. You think buffering is frustrating? Try explaining to Gen Z that we used to sit in absolute monastic silence while trying to record a song off the radio onto a cassette, because the slightest noise could ruin the whole damn thing.
One cough? Ruined.
Dog barks? Ruined.
Your sibling walks in and dares to breathe? Start over, you absolute failure.
There was no fancy “rewind 10 seconds” button. No “let me just download this track in HD.” No, we had to wait. Sometimes hours, just for the DJ to finally play the song we wanted. And that DJ? Oh, they were the enemy. Always talking over the intro, throwing in some unnecessary sound effects, or—worst of all—cutting off the song halfway because heaven forbid we get to record a clean version.
And don’t even get me started on the anxiety of trying to time the recording perfectly. You’d have one finger on the “Play” and “Record” buttons, waiting like a hunter in the wild. Miss that first note? Too bad. Hit “Stop” too early? Hope you enjoy a song that fades out mid-chorus. Hit it too late? Now you’ve got DJ Chad’s obnoxious voice forever embedded in your recording.
And when you finally did get a perfect recording? That cassette became your most prized possession. It was your personal playlist, curated with blood, sweat, and a deep-seated grudge against local radio hosts. You’d carry that thing around like it was the Holy Grail, until the tape inevitably got eaten by your cheap-ass Walkman, and then it was game over.
So yeah, we had to sit completely still like hostages during the recording process, because back then, getting a decent mixtape was an art form. A test of patience. A rite of passage.
And now? Now you little punks just say, “Hey Siri, play [whatever nonsense you’re into],” and it just happens. No suffering. No strategy. No appreciation for the struggle.
Honestly? You don’t deserve music.
