Just when you thought the holiday season couldn’t get any more absurd, Sam’s Club rolls out the “Holidog”—a culinary monstrosity that slaps your festive leftovers onto a hot dog. Because nothing says “Happy Holidays” like indigestion served in a bun.
This gastronomic abomination is making its rounds in select cities, starting with New York City on December 5, 2024, then Nashville on December 9, and finally Dallas on December 12. If you’re not in these areas, consider yourself lucky. But if you’re a glutton for punishment, Sam’s Club encourages you to recreate this horror show at home.
The Holidog comes in three regrettable variations:
- Holiday Mashup: Topped with mashed potatoes and Christmas cookies. Because who hasn’t dreamed of combining dinner and dessert into one soggy mess?
- Frankly Both: Adorned with pumpkin pie and candy canes. A sweet and savory disaster that will confuse your taste buds and haunt your dreams.
- Season’s Meatings: Piled high with turkey and prime rib. For those who believe that meat on meat is the pinnacle of holiday cheer.
If these options don’t make you lose your appetite, Sam’s Club invites you to create your own Holidog nightmare. Start with a hot dog and bun, then desecrate it with Thanksgiving leftovers like stuffing or apple pie, and finish it off with Christmas delights such as ham or candy canes. Top it all with condiments like gravy or whipped cream, and voilà—a festive feast that will have you questioning your life choices.
For those brave enough to try this at home, Sam’s Club suggests hosting a Holidog party. Because nothing brings people together like communal suffering. And don’t forget to share your creations on social media, tagging Sam’s Club, so the world can witness your descent into holiday madness.
In a season already filled with culinary excess, the Holidog stands out as a testament to humanity’s capacity for poor decisions. So, if you’re looking to add a touch of regret to your holiday festivities, the Holidog awaits.